The naming conventions you are talking about there are quirks of Inon.
For DSLRs, we generally talk about the focal length. Back when SLRs were film only, this wasn't confusing. Double the focal length, and you cut the field of view - width and height - roughly in half. So wide angle lenses had short focal lengths (less 50mm) and telephoto lenses had long ones (more than 50mm). 50mm was the "standard" focal length.
Unless you're spending $2200 for a Canon 5D, DSLRs have sensors that are smaller than film. Generally, 1/1.6th the height and width of a 24x36mm frame of film. So we talk about 10mm being the "same" as 16mm in film, because the field of view is the same. These cameras, like my Canon 350D, don't change the focal length, they just capture the center of the image to give a smaller field of view.
If we talked about lenses in terms of field of view, this would a bit simpler, but we don't. We talk about focal lengths instead.
A 60mm lens isn't "better" than a 105mm lens, nor is a 165mm lens "worse." They just have different effective magnification and field of view.
For macro photography, a longer lens means you can take a 1:1 image from farther away. Which is nice if you can't get closer, because the subject is skittish, or there's something in the way, like a crab hiding in some coral. But it does mean you have a larger minimum focal distance, so you can't get as close physically, so there's more water between you and the subject, which can sometimes mean backscatter.
Personally, I've yet to run into a situation where a few inches is a drawback. In fact, I have a 60mm macro lens, and I just bought a 100mm macro lens for use on my next trip. My experience was that I wanted a longer lens on several occasions.
The other main drawback to a long lens is limited field of view. Not for macro photos, but of photos of other fish. The longer the lens, the smaller the field of view, and the more likely it is that you might actually have to back off to capture the entire fish. Now we're talking distances of feet, and backscatter and under-lit subjects are a real possibility.
On the other hand, with the 60mm lens the smaller fish were running away before they filled the frame. Which is why I want to try 100mm. But 60mm is really too long to take an effective photo of something big like a turtle. Octopi were about the largest critters I took with 60mm.
- Gus